For almost 24 years I’ve been a mom. I’ve loved, I’ve cried, I’ve laughed and I’ve felt every emotion in between while raising my children. I’m so incredibly proud of the men they’ve become and I’m amazed at how God uses them daily. They each have their own personality, interests, passions and paths they are pursuing in life and I couldn’t be any more excited. But, truth be told, the time has come for them to start their own lives, and frankly, that sometimes has me watching from the sidelines.
Oh, they still call, they still text me when they need something or just haven’t talked in a while, but they are starting their own adult lives. While it’s hard to let go, it’s what I’ve prepared them to do. They are becoming the very young men I raised them to be, but that also means that they don’t need me as much anymore.
My boys are all starting new amazing adventures, from college, to marriage, to new careers and with each adult step they take, the less they need me. And isn’t that what I taught them to do? I raised them to be independent, to be responsible adults, to dream big and to follow their passions. I taught them to love, to be men of honor and courage, to be honest and trustworthy. I’ve prayed for the women they would one day marry. I’ve asked God to grow them into men who seek God in everything they do.
And that’s who they’ve become and continue to become. And I couldn’t be happier or prouder. But, I want them to know that mom is always available to them, that I am forever in their corner. I loved them from the first moment I knew. I adored them from the very second I discovered their existence. I cherished them from the start. I have always and will always love them. I’ve loved them when they were unloveable and when they didn’t always like or even love me.
But it hasn’t just been me loving them. They’ve loved me. They’ve protected me and they’ve been my strength when I’ve struggled to stand on my own. They’ve supported me and believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself.
So now, I have to let them go. Oh, I won’t be far away and I will always be right here when they need me, but I still have to let them go. I have to let them be the men and the husbands God has designed them to be. But as they move forward, to college, to careers, to life with the amazing women they’ve chosen to be their wives, I hope they’ll never forget that I loved them from the start. I pray they’ll always know how important they are to me.
I hope they’ll always remember I’ve loved them and I love them forever and always, to the moon and back, and back again….and so on. I want them to know my heart will always be connected to their hearts. My heart will burst with love and joy when they experience love and joy and it will break when their hearts break. I have always and will always be the one who has loved them from the start. And now, by the end of 2018, I will have two new daughters to love as well. I’ve prayed for them even before my boys met them. I have loved the idea of them, but now I get to love them as the beautiful, amazing women they are and I know my boys are in good hands. I know they’ll be loved and cherished just as they will love and cherish.
And sometimes, God has an unexpected way of answering our prayers. He moves our lives forward in a way we never imagined…just as I am empowered to allow my children to move on to their own lives as adults, God puts someone new in mine….but that, my friends, is for another post. God knows just what we need and when we need it and just as my boys prepare to embark on their own lives, God gives me the courage to embark on the next phase of my own. It’s times like these I am reminded of just how incredible God is and how amazing my life really is.